The Naked Wife is a revolutionary book where I interviewed over 200 wives, ex-wives, and women for them to tell their stories. These over 200 wives included women from various socio-economical, financial and religious backgrounds.
The Naked Wife is almost 300 pages long and written over a period of six years.
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However, once I completed The Naked Wife, would you believe that it took me about six months to write this conclusion? Truthfully, I wrote five other conclusions, but they didn’t hit the spot for me.
It always felt as if I needed to say more. Even though, I will be writing a part 2 in response to this The Naked Wife.
I was unsure about how to conclude The Naked Wife, as my editors suggested that I needed to respond to every story. However, I didn’t want to respond to every story in The Naked Wife.
I wanted every woman to have a platform to tell her story of being The Naked Wife. Thus, no ifs, and, buts, rebuttals or questions.
Nevertheless, I knew that I needed to write a word of encouragement to every woman who has shared her story of being The Naked Wife.
Additionally, I wanted to speak a word of anointing, healing, encouragement, and salvation to every woman who shared their story. And to the countless other women whose stories were not included in The Naked Wife, even though their stories were represented.
What Is The Naked Wife About?
Here is a short excerpt from The Naked Wife
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The Naked Wife is about being “NAKED.” It is not a sexy or sexual “NAKEDNESS.” But, it is a nakedness of not being covered by her husband. A nakedness of not being loved, valued, protected, and provided for by her husband. It is a nakedness of a wife taking on a husband’s responsibility that he vowed to do for his wife and family.
The Naked Wife is about a wife taking on roles that God did not create her to.
Instead of being provided for, she’s the provider. Instead of being protected, she is the protector. Instead of her husband fighting to save their marriage, she is the one that is struggling.
Instead of flourishing in a safe environment provided by her husband so she can nurture him and their children, it is one of tension, stress, and toxicity.
I was unsure how to conclude The Naked Wife
And then, one day, I received a message from a friend of a wife that tore me up on the inside. I was angry, hurt, irritated, and frustrated for her. I wanted to jump on a plane, fly all the way across the country to rescue her, hug her and tell her who she is in Christ.
Her story goes a little like this.
Let’s call her Rhoda. Rhoda started off by saying, “I need some advice to get me through the day.”
So I thought, ok, that’s doable because we all have trying and stressful days here and there. And, sometimes we just need a word of encouragement.
Rhoda went on to say that “ …we’ve been married for almost 20 years and we have two children.”
We’ll call her husband, Jack. Rhoda went on to say that “even though Jack had multiple affairs and got caught over the years, HE STAYED.”
Let’s Analyze This
STOP THE PRESSES!!!!! WAIT A MINUTE, REWIND AND COME AGAIN!!!!???
- So he had multiple affairs
- She caught him
- He decided to stay
- And what did Rhoda do?
Insert ….B.L.A.N.K. S.T.A.R.E.S…. here….
I had to take a break and came back later to read Rhoda’s story because I just couldn’t get over that part! Is anyone else thinking Rhoda is The Naked Wife?
There were so many infractions in Rhoda’s story that I will not tell her whole story. However, I will share a few of the many issues that she is currently facing.
Rhoda went on to express that there were:
- Physical abuse.
- Verbal abuse.
- Evictions and missing money.
- Disappearing, by leaving home for days at a time without contact.
- Turning, off his phone.
- Hanging, out with the wrong crowd.
- And a host of other incidents.
Before completing the Naked Wife, I think I was living in a bubble. Personally, I will never understand why women would stay in situations like Rhoda’s waiting for him to get right and do right.
I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve been on my own since I was 16 being a teen mom and homeless? Also, I had to struggle to get to where I am as a single mom. But even as a married woman, I notice my tolerance for foolishness is “0.”
Additionally, I think my Spiritual father Bishop Bradshaw, helped me a lot because he would always tell me about who I am in Christ.
So when I hear about the things that many wives and women have put up with, I’m somewhat in shock!! The Naked Wife has opened up my eyes.
As a woman, wife, and mother, I don’t, or won’t tolerate abuse and cheating, and I equate them both.
When I was single, my friends would say “oh Janice, that’s because you are not married yet.” So now I’m married, and I feel the same way. I have “0” tolerance for foolishness.
Can We Work It Out?
It amazes me when I hear anyone who encourages a wife to stay with an abusive husband.
Some people who will say that many couples have worked through abuse and adultery and they are very happy today.
For those people I have a few questions:
- How many times did he cheat?
- Did he confess or did he get caught?
- When she caught him, who suggested counseling?
- Did he come to you and confess it and say let’s go to counseling or did you have to drag him down to see the pastor or the marriage counselor?
- Did he change his behavior?
- Do you trust him or do you have to stay on him like he is 2?
- Do you have to check his phone and social media to make sure he is not sexting another woman?
- Are you carrying the marriage alone?
- If money was not an issue would you stay with him or would you leave him?
- Are you checking is Viagra to see if any are missing?
- You don’t have to answer this but are you happy with a cheating husband?
- When was the last time he hit you?
- And, don’t you think you deserve better?
- Are you The Naked Wife?
Yes, yes, I know that there are many couples, who have overcome many obstacles like cheating, abuse, babies outside of the marriage and so on.
However, that’s not every woman’s story and why should it be?
Shoulders Verses Bosom
Do you know one thing I have noticed once I completed The Naked Wife?
Somehow, somewhere, society and the church has taken the responsibility of the marriage off of the husband!? The husband who is the head, leader, example, a watchman on the wall and most importantly, the King in his own home and marriage.
However, even though the husband is the head, his responsibility has been taken off his shoulder and placed solely on the bosom of the wife. Can you say The Naked Wife?
Answer The Following Questions for Me Please!
- Why is it expected for a wife to stay in a marriage where there has been abuse, adultery, and other fractures?
- Why is it not ok for a wife to walk away from a husband who has treated her less than a wife?
- Why is the burden of the marriage placed on the wife?
- How is it a husband can get up and leave, do what he wants to, shack up for years with another woman, but it is expected that the wife remains there? Anf if he returns she should welcome him with open arms?
- Here’s the biggie! How is it that a husband can feel comfortable depending on his wife to provide for all of their needs?
- Why is a wife expected to put up and deal with a husband who refuses to do right by her?
- Why are women and wives programmed to make excuses for a cheating husband?
- Why is it that the burdens of marriage are placed upon the wife?
- Why is it that it is the wife’s responsibility to keep her husband happy, and she needs to keep her size two shape even after five kids, but the husbands can grow big and fat with the huge beer gut, but it is expected for the wife to stay young and sexy?
- Who told you that the wife sets the temperature of the home?
- Who told you to stay in an abusive marriage and pray for your abusive husband until he stops beating you?
- Who told you that you should make excuses for a husband that’s abusing you?
Very Important Question
Do you know how many women die yearly from the hands of their husbands who vowed to love and protect them?
I know a well-known wife whose husband had beaten her with a chair in a restaurant. You might know this abuser who happens to be a gospel artist!!?
Guess what she did though? She went to court and made excuses for him. Ironically, a year later he almost killed her.
A Few More Questions
- Who told you to stay with an abusive man?
- Who told you to stay with a man that has cheated on you for years?
- Who told you to get with old Billy Bob that doesn’t have a pot to pee in and window to throw it through and make him into a husband for you? Help him to get his GED, a job?
- Who told you that if a man isn’t about anything that you should marry him and take care of him because a man brings more to the table than his money?
- Who told you that you don’t need a man to provide for you and because you make a good living, he doesn’t have to make a living?
- Who told you that if you wash, cook, clean, sex him and swing off the chandelier that he wouldn’t cheat on you? Ok, so you did all that, and he cheated on you, now what?
- Who told you, that since he promised that he wouldn’t hit you again, he won’t. But, Ten years later he is still beating you, and you must put makeup on your face to cover the bruises.
- Who told you that, that was love?
- Who told you to stay in that marriage and you know your husband has raped your baby girl and is still sexually abusing her?
- Who told you that, if you forgive him, you should stay?
I submit to you that if you are in any of the above mention situations, you are The Naked Wife! But, you don’t have to continue to be The Naked Wife, because my book has some open and honest conversations
But, you don’t have to continue to be The Naked Wife, because my book has some open and honest conversations with you.
The Dirty Truth
My point is, as women we have been believed a lot of lies. Both in the church and society about love, sex, relationships, and marriages.
But, it’ts time we begin to tear those lying strongholds down, that has had us incarcerated for years.
I write more extensively about this in my new book “The Sacrifice of Marriage,” which is a spin-off from The Naked Wife, coming soon.
But in the meantime, be sure to read The Naked Wife.
Ladies, it is time for us to rethink some things we have been taught and believed. It’s time for us to question some of those subliminal messages that are in our sub-conscience.
The dirty truth and my belief have always been, LIFE IS WORTH LIVING!!
The Naked Wife
If you are reading this article and you are The Naked Wife, I encourage you to read The Naked Wife, in its entirety.
I believe that if you are The Naked Wife, once you read my book, a light bulb will come on for you.
The Naked Wife, October 27
Thank you so much for reading one of my many conclusions for my book The Naked Wife. It is due to come out on October 27, 2017. I hope that you plan to purchase and read it in its entirety.
And if you do, please stop by and let me know how it has changed your life.
What are your thoughts on some of the questions I asked above?
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