Married at First Sight is one of the only shows I currently watch. There was a couple on season nine named Amber and Matt that I believe we can learn a lot from.
Cause & Effect
Amber is an English teacher while matt is a former basketball player. As the season progressed, we learned that Amber’s mom abandoned her along with her family, including Amber’s father and twin sister, Megan, when the girls were seven.
Thus, the girls were raised by their father and extended family. Amber being abandoned by her mom, caused a multitude of issues including abandonement, despeation for love and low self esteem.
Based on Amber’s behavior on the show, she didn’t seem to have gotten any counseling. However, if she did, then it didn’t help.
You Can’t Buy True Love
Amber want to buy love and please whoever she is with. We learned from Megan, Amber’s twin sister, that Amber was giving her whole paycheck to her ex-boyfriend.
Can you imagine working 80 hours and then some and then giving your whole paycheck to your “boyfriend” because you’re trying to buy his love, attention and faithfulness? Chile Please!!
Can’t Y’all Just Work It Out?
Amber got married to Matt who also has several issues of his own. We learned that Matt’s parents were married for thirty years and have been divorced for two years.
Matt’s parents divorced caused several fears with Matt. Fears such as “the feelings changing” and having kids with the wrong woman and so on.
In all fairness though, these are serious concens we should all have when entering into a marriage. And no, marraige is not based on feelings alone, but we need to make sure our feelings are geniune and pure.
And can we all agree that we should be careful who we have children with?
With Matt, one of the questions he asked in his reference to his parents divorce was “why couldn’t they just work it out?”
Matt said a few things that had me looking at him with the side eye. For example, Matt stated that he has been his own since he was sixteen.
However, he attended a boarding school. Wait a second! How have you been on your own since you were sixteen, yet you attended a boarding school?
This somewhat contradicts the “being on his own” because surely someone was paying for school.
Even though Matt is a retired professional basketball player, he was still open to playing if the opportunity presented itself. However, Matt planned to begin a detailing business with one of his friends.
Strangely, Matt didn’t have a home or an apartment of his own but is nomadic and lives with of one of his friends. Nevertheless, I guess I do understand, because why pay for an apartment in the States, when you are away at least ten months out of the year.
However, a huge question for me was “how are you ready to get married yet, is not preparing a stable home to bring his wife to?”
Mother and Son Dance?
Sadly, for Matt, he didn’t invite any blood relatives to his wedding because he didn’t want to seem be choosing sides beween his parents.
Nevertheless, Matt stated that he was thinking of inviting his mom. Instead, Matt decided to stick to his extended family aka “his boys.”
Ironically, while the procucers knew that Matt’s mom was not present, they still called for a son and mother dance. That was so low! But, you know how these shows are, they do all these underhand things for ratings and drama.
After Matt and Amber got married, they seemed happy for about three days. Even though, I could tell that Matt seemed a little embarrseed by Amber gushing about him, how cute he was and so on.
Additionally, Matt was uncomfortable with how sexually open and comfortable Amber was with him. ( I will write why in a future post.)
Everything seemed great between the two. Many of us thought wow, they are really getting along on this vacation with the other three couples in Antigua.
Unresolved Issues Will Always Come Back
While on the honeymoon, the topic of finances came up, and Matt asked Amber’s thoughts on if he had to go away to play ball for a few months out of the year? Amber replied that it would be DEAL-BRAKER FOR HER.
Additionally, Amber stated that she made eighty-thousand dollars per year and she could take care of them until he got the detailing business off the ground.
The look on Matt’s face said it all, and for me, that was the sign of Matt beginning to withdraw himself from Amber.
However, at the couples tell all, Matt dropped a bombshell about Amber only fifteen minutes into their wedding.
Furthermore, on the wedding night, Matt was concerned about Amber’s openness and sexually freedom on the night of the wedding.
Part two coming soon.